The Accomplishable New Year's Resolution

I hope everyone's 2011 was killer, but I hope 2012 is an even bigger year for you all. Learn from your mistakes from this year, and live it up in 2012. But most importantly, be happy with everything you do. If the Mayans think 2012 is the last chance for us, then make it one hell of a year to remember!

It’s that time of year. Yes, 2012 is knocking on everyone’s door whether they like it or not. This means a flood of diet changes, exercise goals, and other familiar resolutions will be made that will most likely only last a week. But this year, instead of making a goal that I know I won’t be able to reach (like my last year’s resolution to stop swearing. It lasted about 37 seconds), I want to make a plan that I can stick with.

So what’s my goal for 2012? (Drum roll please…) Well guys, it’s to start living in the moment. Go ahead, judge me for the cliché-romantic-comedy-ness of my resolution, but I really think it’s a good one. One that will last past January 10^th.

My grandmother made me realize that we tend to breeze by the small moments of each day, rushing through every task we do without really experiencing them. This Christmas when we were opening presents, my dad would collect the wrapping paper as soon as it was ripped off the packages to throw it away. Literally. He sometimes would get so focused on throwing paper away that he’d start unwrapping my presents for me. (Well, not really. But you get the point.) Upon seeing this, my grandmother said, “Now, Wayne. You’ve got to sit down and relax! Enjoy what is happening now instead of trying to move everything faster!”

I started wondering if I handled life like my dad, trying to make the time go by faster or thinking about the next step before it has even happened. And I’m guilty of doing that. I tend to think up scenarios in my mind, planning out my life, even before the first step has happened. I have been rushing life instead of taking in what is right there in front of me.

This is a terrible habit for two reasons: one, if life doesn’t go the way I planned it—the way I formulated it in my head—then I’ll be disappointed. If things don’t follow through with the guy I wanted to see, or if plans for a weekend don’t go smoothly, just like the way I wanted them to, then I’m going to be bummed out. And who wants to be sad about one little thing not going according to plans? Not me. And secondly, if I plan everything out or rush through things, I’m just missing the little curveballs or the awesomeness life surprisingly throws at me. I’m not embracing the fact that something really good can come out of some small event that I’m ignoring.

Here comes the inspirational part of this post. You’re welcome.

Life isn’t meant to be rushed through. You only live once. (C’mon, listen to Drake! YOLO, people, that’s the motto.) I mean, if you had one life left in a game of Mario, would you see how fast you could go through it? No. You would slowly make your way to the end, grabbing every coin or life mushroom thingy (I’ve never known what they were called) in order to make your trip safer and more enjoyable. You want to make sure you have everything you need in order to make it to the end.

And that’s how I see my 2012. It’s the year I’m going to enjoy all of those coins and little mushrooms (not in an illegal drug way, Mom…) in order to have a fully enjoyable year, and ultimately life. It’s time to start living in the moment and acknowledging the fact we do only have one chance to live this one life.  

So calm down. Live in the moment. Don’t throw away that wrapping paper before it even hits the ground—you’re going to miss something worthwhile if you keep rushing life.

How to Avoid Being "That Girl"

Yay, finally another post. I'm hanging in there people. This one is about what not to do as a female. Yup. So learn something all my lovely ladies. I know you can do it!

And don't worry, next up will be the fellas. So keep checking up for more ever-useful blogs from yours truly.

I know this is a different direction from what I usually write, but it’s still useful. Like really useful. It’s about what not to do as a girl. You don’t want to be “that girl.” Oh, you know what I mean. It’s fill in the blank. And I’m here to fill in that blank. So you’re welcome.

First of all, don’t be that girl who posts lovey-dovey stuff as your statuses. Cool, you have an awesome boyfriend. That’s just great. But your 859 friends on Facebook (most of which are just random people who you have no idea who they are, let’s be honest) don’t care if he’s the greatest boy on God’s green earth.  Oh, he texted you “good morning beautiful” this morning? Cool, go gush to your best friend about it. Or your diary. Not the entire Facebook world.

On the topic of statuses, don’t be the girl who has to mention how you’re “so over so-and-so” and how “you’re so happy that it’s over.” Obviously, you’re not over it. You wouldn’t be bringing it up every single status if you didn’t care anymore. You’re making yourself look like a desperate idiot if you think you’re fooling anyone—obviously you know this boy will see your status, and say “aw, she’s over me? Bummer, I see how awesome she is and now I to win her back and sweep her off her feet with my noble steed.” And you’d be more than willing to get back with him despite your 16 statuses saying you’re, like, “so over the drama.” Barf. Just don’t say anything if you’re really over him.

I might as well just cover the girl mistakes dealing with boys now, since there are a lot of them. Don’t be the girl who needs a boy to be happy. Oh, you know who you are. “Ugh, but I just know if I had a guy to cuddle with and watch movies with and blah blah blah I’d be so much happier.” No. First of all, if you find a guy that just wants to snuggle with you 24/7 and watch chick flicks, you need to check his man card. Second of all, you don’t have the right mindset if you think having a boyfriend will make you happier or a better person. So just stop it. Be happy being single and ready to mingle.

 These girls are usually the ones to have a different boyfriend seemingly every week. I will literally check my newsfeed on Facebook and I see girls go from “in a relationship” to “single” and back to “in a relationship” faster than I can post a comment. It’s bad. Don’t be that girl. It makes you look floozy and desperate. No one likes that.

Okay, that’s enough of that. Now onto the non-boy related stuff. Girls, for the sake of the public, please please please don’t be that girl who wears Uggs with skirts. Or any non-pant bottoms. It’s not cute. And it’s one of my biggest pet peeves. What, did you wake up in the morning and your feet thought it was winter and your thighs thought it was summer? No. You’re just making yourself look like a confused, fashion-deprived girl. So, no more.

Another thing I can’t stand is when girls tweet every 23 seconds. (Basically, girls need to take a social-networking 101 class. They need help.) “Walking to the library and saw a squirrel!” 19 seconds later… “Library is sooo crowded!” One minute later… “Omg, seeing people who you’re trying to avoid. #helpme.” Just stop it. Seriously. When I scroll down my Twitter timeline and see 8 tweets from the same person in a row, I just want to scream. Cool, you can tweet that you’re studying. But when you tweet about every single thing that you see, hear, smell, feel, or wish would happen, it’s annoying as hell. I mean, you’re supposed to be studying! How can you tweet and study at the same time? You can’t, so stop it. For the sake of your grades and my sanity.

The next thing that definitely needs dire attention is what happens at parties—don’t be that girl who always blacks out, hysterically cries, or yells at a party. It’s not cute; it will never be cute, so stop doing it. Honestly, girls, the black-out look will never be in style (I’m sorry, but the running eye liner and the nappy hair are just not pretty), and adding the yelling and screaming isn’t helping. You just look like you should be on the show The Bad Girls Club with those really terrifying middle aged women who think they’re 20 and can squeeze into miniskirts. Guys aren’t turned on by the needy, scary, and ugly behavior that comes with the black-outs. They aren’t like, “oh my god, runny make-up, glazed over eyes, and a bad attitude! She’s so hot!” No. Sorry to be a party pooper, (ha, get it? Party pooper? God, I’m funny.) but you will not be getting action that night. Except maybe between your toilet and the alcohol in your stomach.

So, girls, what have we learned from this? Hopefully it was that no one likes a mushy-gushy boyfriend bragger, or a girl in denial about being over someone, or a girl who likes ingesting more alcohol than the actual keg.

Hopefully you will change your ways (all 5 of you who read this). But don’t worry. The boys aren’t in the clear. The next post will be for them.

So get out there and listen to me so I won’t have to defriend you from Facebook or unfollow you from Twitter!